For some reason I got to thinking about the musical “Wicked“. so laying in bed I grabbed the tablet and did a search on you tube search and found clips of the show but stumbled upon two numbers that I just can’t get out of my head. Every time I hear them, the tears start and I am beginning to find comfort in them. I have been doing some real soul-searching about WHO I am and the person I have become. It’s those people who have walked in our lives, left their footprints and actually made us better if we have learned just one thing from them, we are better for knowing them.
The song “For Good” is sung between Glinda and Elphaba, as they part for the final time but they take the time to tell each other how much they are better for knowing the other. We have people who come in and out of our life for different reason. some stay and become close friends, others leave when their time is through. There are some people who can come into the picture and we think they are wonderful and going to be that ONE person who will make the biggest difference but they turn out turning lift upside down. They pull you down into a place that you just have no idea if you can find your way back. It’s those times where you cant even see what is going on,when you lose your focus,self-confidence and who you think you are. I have had a life long struggle with confidence, never being pretty enough, smart enough….by today’s standards I was even bullied. Its been in the few years that I started to find out who I am, to gain that elusive confidence and to see myself through others eyes and to start to understand to see what they see. “For Good” has helped me to discover those special people who have come into my life and become a part of who I am now. Not only people who are in my life that I have contact with but people who I call my Facebook family, and my friends on Twitter. I know that might sound a little off or whatever but it’s those people who have been there when things have gotten tough and are still here now that have taught me a lot. I have one friend on twitter, I don’t even know his REAL name but he so gets the love for the scarlet and grey.(Ohio State University) Football Team. He has no idea how much he helps me with being less home sick for my scarlet and grey during football season. I just hope when he read this that he will know that I am better for knowing him.
Defying Gravity is taking that step outside your comfort zone and NOT letting anyone stop you. For a long time now, I have been so scared to take that step and fly. For some reason I have always been afraid of what people might think. I am starting to see that I have the confidence to make those steps outside the box and try new things. I put my studies on hold to raise my family and now that they are grown, all I want to do is write, be a published writer and try my hand at everything that is related to writing. I am learning to defy gratify some but I also know I can do better. Fly farther, even if its solo. Starting this blog I am doing just that. Not many people know about this as of yet but I hope that people will be able to find something that they can take away. The biggest thing I need to remember is that I can’t let those people who I am most afraid of to pull me down. Follow those dreams. As it says in the song “Defying Gratify”. ” I may be flying solo but at least I will be flying free, and to those people who ground me, take a message back from me”:
I AM DEFYING GRAVITY