1347783509 I FACED A FEAR AND WON!

OK, let me explain. Partner Pj was ask to change the television aerial for a mate of ours and he needed my help. So, I decided that I was going up the ladder to give him a hand taking it down. I held on tight as I began the climb. One step at a time. Making sure my footing was OK before going on. I finally got to the top and on the roof. It took a little to get my footing but I made it up there. I had to find my balance, before I could make my way to the aerial  That made me realize that a lot of things were actually out of balance in my life. I began to think that maybe while I was up there I could get a better perspective in things, get new ideas to help deal with those things that maybe I was worrying about too much and figure out that there may be a few things I just need to let go of.

Once Pj went back down to put together the new antenna  I had plenty of time to think and reflect. It was a roof with a view, I was going to make the most of being up there. First was my birthday, turning 50 tomorrow at the time of writing this. A few months ago the thought really rattled me. How it was going to be earth shattering. You know what, lots has changed in my first 50 years around, the computer, Steve Jobs and Apple. Facebook and Twitter. I was raised a Woody Hayes kid in the traditions of Ohio State. I walked in my very first 6 Kilometer walk and this year at 50 it will be my third go around. I have two amazing girls and wonderful grand babies. I also had time to get angry, yell at God in some ways. There are still times I get pissed about Pj’s accident and WHY did things change. Why me, what did I do to deserve going through all this? I am sitting up here by choice but what it is you want me to see? When I started looking down I could see into things in a different way. It was like a whole new view on what was gong on in my life. I could see the things that I was dealing with that were taking energy that I really needed to be putting that energy else ware. It was time to let go of those little things that just were really wasting my time. I was sticking to my life thinking that Gary taught me that at the end of the day let go. The day is over and I just can’t change whats happened. I am starting to get a heap of projects going but I think I have an underlying fear of losing myself in them. I become the too professional Cricket and not the person I want to be, who is the writer, photographer, mad knitter. I lost who I was at one time and I just don’t want to have that happen again. I am just beginning to discover that I am pretty amazing if I do say so. I have seen a lot in my life and done some pretty cool stuff, met some amazing people. It not everyday you get to meet someone you really admire on Facebook and in person, and that you can call them friends.

While sitting up there I had a really good look at what I was seeing around me. I ask myself to really look, to look beyond what I was seeing, like the buses and the cars, houses, kids walking home from schools. It is an idea you have to open yourself up to. Once you do that you tend to notice that the sky is a little more blue, the grass is greener, the sun shines a bit brighter. It gives you a good perspective to really decide what you really need to worry about and what is draining your energy. Once back on solid ground I felt so renewed and full of energy. I can take on what is coming my way, and deal with those surprises. Bring on 50, it’s going to be a great year.

I have lots of new projects in the pipeline that I am really looking forward to . I will be blogging again with the Ohio State Buckeyes during their gridiron season. I set myself a new goal of blogging during the Chicago white Sox Baseball Season, which will be a big challenge but I can’t wait.

The biggest thing I learned is to embrace life, take each day as it comes and stop worrying about the small stuff that is an energy waster. Find ways to meet those needs that you have, taking that frustrating energy and using it in positive ways.

You never know what you might accomplish

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