After reading some of the stupid and utter mind-boggling comments about Robin Williams passing and his battle with depression it’s completely beyond reasoning how some people have NO CLUE what it is like losing a parent and in the way that Robin has left us. I refuse to give credit to all the idiots out there who think that being a troll is worth it. YOU have no clue the damage you cause, especially during this time.
Why did I just vent that, So I can talk to you about this: I battle Depression. There, I said it and I am not ashamed to tell you. It has been a life long battle and I have worked hard to get back up and not let that “Black Dog” take hold and win. There are good days and bad but then you just figure out how to get through the next five minutes, then the next hour and before too long you made it through the day. You go to bed and then get up and do it all again.
Life events will set you back. Losing Parents, close family. Close friends who have been your anchor up and move. I never told anyone but the wonderful person who taught me so much, I was a mess when he passed away. I have taken what he taught me and I share it with anyone I can, I never got to tell him how much he changed my life for the better. He has no idea how his teaching has gotten me through some really crappy times.
We need to talk about depression MORE, make sure that it is not a taboo subject any more. Sure its something you cant actually see but it is there and its real. I have friends who have had Postpartum Depression, I have a Sorority Sister who recently lost her Dad, I am not there with her but I can check on her, make sure that she knows that I am there along with her other sisters if she needs us for anything. The only thing I can do is to listen, that is the biggest thing that any of us need or want at times, is to just be heard.
The one thing that gets me the most is when people say, OK just snap out of it or just get over it. It is not that simple. Thanks to a Google the definition of depression is severe, typically prolonged, feelings of despondency and dejection. Getting bullied or trolled on social media is the worse things that can happen. There is no place for negativity in any of this, and I do the best I can to keep a safe Twitter feed and for my Sisters a safe place to share and for them to know that they will be heard.
I will be the first to say I do not understand the loss of a child, or a spouse in any way. It really gets me when people say they understand then I know they don’t. It is human nature to make that response but just stop and think for a change if you were in their shoes, how would you feel if they said the same thing to you.
I know this might not make a lot of sense, guess what I am trying to get you to be more aware of friends and family that might be going through a hard time, ask them if they are OK and really be interested in what they have to say. Find something positive to help them focus on, be there during the holidays when times are tough and help them find a special way to honor that person they are missing.
Gary taught me that when the sun is rising, God gives you what you can handle for the day. When the sun goes down you cant worry about it any more, its done for the day. Take care of yourself in the evening and try to rest. Get up and go at it again tomorrow. At some point you might start to see that the grass is a little greener and the sky is a little more blue.
We can do this together if we just start by talking, and really listening. You never know who you might help. We are one question here in Australia
R U OK?